Eat Fresh

Check it out! A Lunch Blog!

So pretty much 3-of-5 days a week, I go to the Subway around the corner from my house so I can eat at home and let the pups play. I have two awesome 14-moth-old black labs, Abbey and Sofie.

I go to Subway so frequently that the manager knows what I get and just starts making it when I get there. Perhaps sad to some, but I much prefer to look at it as special treatment.

Today was special, but in a much different way.

There is a new-ish girl that works there. Not the brightest tool in the shed. You seriously have to go one item at a time with her. She is pregnant, and today, she says that she is feeling sick, which is exactly what you want the person making your food to say. Thank God for those plastic gloves.

Anyway, as she is putting the veggies on (lettuce, tomatoes and pickles, FYI) she gets this look on her face. Now, I have never been pregnant, but I understand that certain things tend to cause nausea randomly for pregnant women. This was the look I was getting when she reached to put on the honey mustard, salt & pepper and vinegar & oil.

I was all prepared for her to reach for one of the plastic Subway bags and proceed to hurl. Instead she just hiccup-burped, which is bad but not nearly as bad as it could've been. I felt kinda bad for her, but seriously, if you feel sick (pregnancy or otherwise), don't come to work if your job is to prepare food in front of the people who are supposed to eat it.

That's it. Have a nice rest of the day. Get back to work!

Monopoly is Doing WHAT?!?!

Monopoly announced they are changing their game for the first time since the original release in 1935. Wow, Monopoly is old.

Anyway, the Atlantic City landmarks are being replaced. I will be kinda sad for the B&O Railroad to go away. That always made me laugh.

Starting today, fans can go to the Monopoly website and vote for their favorite landmarks from 22 cities.

The part that sucks is that you can tell this is a bad idea from Hasbro. I mean, just look at the landmarks they are trying to replace Park Place and Boardwalk with! There's not even Graceland or Sun Studios or Beale Street on there!!!!

Somebody oughta shove that damn Monopoly guy's monocle straight up Alan G. Hassenfield's ass!

Saturday Night: The Good, The Bad and The (very) Ugly

A group went to Revolution Saturday night for Megan's birthday celebration. It was a lot of fun until the end, but I'll get to that in a minute.

A New Personal Best
Nick and Lea were there, which got the evening off to a great start. I don't get to hang out with them enough. And when Nick referenced vibrators only 20 minutes into the evening, and Lea made a comment, I told her that was a new personal record for me -- to go 20 minutes into an outing without something sexual or wrong coming up!

YO-SHI-DA'S
Later in the evening, after Tami, Andrew and Greg got there and the alcohol was flowing, Nick and Lea mentioned how much they like Shake's. I am a fiend for Shake's, FYI. When Tami was pregnant with Ashlynn, we used to go to Shake's every night it seemed. (I will prolly have to borrow Megan's "Flashback Blog" idea and tell a story on that topic).

Anyway, I leaned over to Tami, who was in a conversation with other people there at that point, and told her that Nick and Lea liked Shake's. To which, she turns to them and yells: "YO-SHI-DA's! WOOHOO!" Uhm, Tami; I said, "Shake's," not "Steaks."

FYI, Mr. Yoshida's is a magic marinade that we put on pretty much everything we grill. Seriously best stuff ever. I still wouldn't recommend it as a flavor of Shake's.

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More fun stuff went on like the woman who was an expert hulahooper, in a leopard-skin pill-box hat, which coincidentally was the opening song (Dylan cover) of the band, which was very good. A new graduate assistant in the center for student-athlete services and his wife came. Rodney and Jay were there. And Siren and Chloe (Revolution white german shepherds) were there. It was great fun, until . . . . . .

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Here it is: I am an ass. Andrew and I had a bit of a misunderstanding, disagreement, what-have-you Friday night. It really hurt and ate at me (sorry, I am sensitive). I tried to explain it Saturday afternoon, but that didn't go so well, either.

Fast-forward to late Saturday night, after pretty much everyone was gone. No one wanted me to drive home, and they were right. I am stubborn, though. I made an ass of myself. I said things, did things and even texted things that I am very ashamed of now. No, I didn't drive myself home. Tami did. Thank God.

I want to very seriously and sincerely and publicly apologize to Andrew, Tami, Megan and Greg for the scene that I caused. I can't take back what I did or said, as much as I have spent all of today wishing I could.

Sorry for the Debbie Downer blog content, but I did something very wrong, and I need to own up to it and accept full responsibility. I pride myself in being a good friend, but last night was a very big mark on that record, and I will not try to spin it or deny blame or pretend like it didn't happen. I am truly sorry.

Why Do Friends Piss You Off More Than Enemies?

Today has been a bad day.

My Apologies . . . . . . .

Apparently I have a lot to apologize for today.

First, my apologies to my #1 reader: Nick. Your comments are the driving force behind A.D.D. Generation, and I am grateful to have you.

Second, Coca-Cola BlaK is not that bad. Don't get me wrong, it's not great, but it's not nearly the train wreck that B-to-the-E (Budweiser's failed attempt at an energy beer) was. Ethan and I each drank one tonight, and I'm very wide awake -- it's 10:16 p.m.

BlaK tastes like a Cocaccino. Kinda reminded me of a real vanilla Coke (from the drugstore -- not the crap they can and sell that tastes like chemical), but they added some coffee flavor to the vanilla. I definitely wouldn't recommend drinking more than one in a sitting.

Last, apparently Megan took exception to me announcing her crabs issue.

So there you have it: two apologies and an acknowledgement - haha. Did you really think I was going to apologize to you just because Friday is your birthday??? Happy birthday!

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As a warning, it has occurred to me that perhaps I should start blogging some personal stuff so that you, my readers, can get to know me better. There's more to me than humor, you know. I have real thoughts and opinions. Really, I do. Apparently I am going to start inflicting them upon you.

Nothing Special

Sorry I've been gone so long. I wish I could tell you I've been out fighting crime or saving the rainforests or rescuing endangered animals ... but the truth is nothing really special has been going on.

We've had WAY too much to do at work and a lot of sporting events going on, and the funny stuff that's happened in the last couple weeks has been situational and would take too long to set up. Plus, I don't think my fragile ego could take another "Best of blogs, worst of blogs" remark from Nick. PS -- thanks for the text inviting ME to the sports car!

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A friend of mine who shall remain nameless -- 'cause that's the way he rolls, and I respect that -- called last night whilst at the grocery store and told me about a new product on the market: Coca-Cola BlaK. Yes, BlaK. After several hysterical comments, he purchased the niche market product, which is apparently Coke and coffee. I mean, what a match made in Heaven! People like me should not be allowed to consume this beverage, because I may never sleep again after we try it. I wonder if Jack and BlaK will be like Red Bull and Vodka? If you've never seen me under the influence of that maniacal concoction, you are really missing out.

Anyway, if you'd like more BlaK information, click here.

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Megan has crabs.